Chapter 83: The Clown

A pale clown mask, two comical upturned mustaches, an oversized black cloak fastened at the chest with a cruciform pendant—encountering such a figure in this environment was nothing short of terrifying. No one could muster a laugh. This was no ordinary cloak; it was the materialized form of the "Banshee Veil," boasting formidable resistance to ninjutsu.

“Damn it…” Kakashi’s arm was already crackling with lightning, but it was too late.

The clown had seized Rin, holding her hostage with a strangely shaped kunai.

“Kakashi… Kakashi… as expected of you, always so cautious…” The clown—none other than Hakugi in disguise—had been toying with Team Steel for a whole hour just to set up his "Jumpscare Box" skill.

“From the very start, your target was us…” Kakashi’s brow furrowed. If he had wanted to sneak into the watchtower by disguise, he would never have hidden Steel and Izumo in a box.

“How clever.” Hakugi tightened his grip around Rin’s neck, tilting his head with a grin.

“Kakashi… Don’t worry about me…” Rin reached for her ninja tool pouch, only to realize it was already in the hands of the fake Izumo, who was rummaging through it.

“Who are you, really?” Kakashi kept his Lightning Blade charged, searching for a chance to rescue Rin.

“You see the mask, don’t you?”

“I’m not blind,” Kakashi replied coldly.

“I wear it to hide my identity, so, clever Kakashi… don’t you think your question is a bit redundant?” Hakugi cocked his head. “A better question would be: what am I trying to do?”

“You bastard! Let Rin go! Or I swear, I’ll kill you!!” Obito, seeing Rin taken hostage, cast aside all fear and was consumed by rage.

“Hee, impotent fury… Maybe you should start by pulling out the senbon stuck in your backside.” Hakugi teased.

Obito, clutching his rear, yanked out the senbon with a grimace of pain—thankfully, it wasn’t poisoned.

“So what do you want, then?” Kakashi stepped forward, as if searching for the optimal angle of attack.

“Don’t be foolish. I know Lightning Blade is fast, but this kunai is coated with a deadly poison… slurp.” Hakugi extended his tongue, inching it toward the blade.

Kakashi and Obito stared at him with burning intensity.

“Idiot, as if I’d lick it!” Hakugi pressed the kunai to Rin’s throat again. “The one I really want… is you, Uchiha Obito!”

Rescuing hostages is always a delicate art—unless you favor the Russian method.

“I’ll do whatever you want, just let Rin go!” Obito pleaded.

“Oh? Anything at all?” Hakugi cackled.

“Anything!” Obito nodded emphatically.

“Heh… I have two pills here. Pick one and swallow it.” Hakugi tossed a glass vial over, inside which rolled a black and a red pill.

“What kind of pills are these?” Obito asked, inspecting them.

“If you take the black one, you’ll die slowly, your whole body rotting and reeking in excruciating agony.”

“And the red one?”

“The same fate, but with a strawberry flavor.” Hakugi grinned.

“...Then I’ll take the strawberry one.” Obito pinched the red pill, slowly moving it toward his mouth.

“No, Obito!” Rin struggled desperately.

A slow smile broke across Hakugi’s face.

“I’m not that stupid!” Obito suddenly smiled.

“What…” Hakugi suddenly sensed a shadow darting from the darkness behind him—a small dog, Pakkun, who had been completely forgotten in the heat of the moment.

Sometimes, breaking the stalemate requires nothing more than the intervention of an inconspicuous, non-combatant ninja hound.

Awooo! Hakugi’s arm was bitten, and he actually toppled over thanks to a small dog!

Kakashi had been waiting for this moment. In the blink of an eye, he launched his Lightning Blade, streaking a blue arc through the night sky.

“So fast…” But Hakugi wasn’t about to wait for death. The moment he was bitten, he anticipated a follow-up attack and immediately triggered “Counterstorm.”

This technique combined both physical and ninjutsu attacks. The Preta Path shield did not activate, and Counterstorm couldn’t fully negate the attack. Though he twisted aside, the sharp lightning grazed him, leaving a gash that healed within moments.

Channeling wind chakra in his leg for a “Charged Strike” via Counterstorm’s finisher, Hakugi became a blur, kicking Kakashi hard in the stomach and sending him flying.

“He dodged it?” Kakashi rolled to his feet, astonished. Lightning Blade, ranked S-class, was said to be fast enough to sever lightning itself—almost at the speed of light. Yet someone had evaded it from such close range?

“A mere cheap trick…” Hakugi glanced at Rin, who had already been rescued by Obito while he was distracted—the hostage was lost.

“Damn it, now I can finally fight you head-on! I’m going to beat you to death!” Obito roared in fury.

“Yet now we have a dog hostage.” Tobi held up Pakkun by the scruff.

“Sorry, Kakashi, I got caught,” Pakkun said, his head drooping.

“Tsk tsk, I’ve always wanted to ask: if you found a meat bone and a pile of dung on the road, which would you eat first?” Tobi teased.

“Sorry, I’m really not in the mood to talk about food right now,” Pakkun replied with a glum expression.

“You bastard, can’t you fight like a man? Always taking hostages—how low can you go?” Obito was nearly losing his mind.

“Eh? You’re right. A man shouldn’t stoop to cheap tricks. So I’ll perform a magic box trick for you.” With a flourish, Hakugi produced a black box.

He stuffed Pakkun inside, leaving only his head and tail sticking out.

“It’s time to witness a miracle. Don’t blink…” Hakugi gave a deep bow, then drew a short blade and sawed down through the box—without a single drop of blood.

“Awooo!” Pakkun howled in misery. “I’m dead, I’m dead… I can feel my butt being sliced off…”

Hakugi held a half of the box in each hand and bowed to the audience.

Wow—Tobi applauded with all his might.

“Pakkun!” Kakashi, driven by rage, launched another Lightning Blade.

Zzzzt—

Kakashi’s lightning-charged right hand plunged into Hakugi’s oversized cloak, blood dripping onto his forearm. “You won’t escape this time!”

“Kakashi! Watch out!” Obito’s shout came from behind him.

Kakashi jerked his head up. He had stabbed not Hakugi, but a straw man wearing a terrifying mask!

Caw, caw, caw, caw…

The straw man exploded into a storm of black crows that swarmed Kakashi’s face.

“Damn… I fell for it!” Kakashi instantly drew his blade, slicing the crows into fluttering shreds, but no subsequent attack came.

This clown was like a wicked old cat toying with mice—killing them was never his true goal. What he relished was watching them unravel under his tricks.

He was a complete and utter madman.

“Pakkun… I’ll avenge you.” Kakashi gripped his White Fang dagger tightly as he gazed at Pakkun’s bisected body in the box.

“Actually… I think I might still be salvageable.” Pakkun pushed himself up with his front paws, while his other half—the hindquarters—wriggled around randomly.

“???” The three of them stared in bewilderment.

Pakkun crawled over to his own rear end and sniffed. “Oh, it’s my first time smelling my own fart. Ah, what a pungent delight.”

“A mere cheap trick,” Hakugi declared from atop a tree, bowing with a hand on his chest, a twisted smile on his lips. “The real show… is yet to come, and you’ll have to experience it yourselves…”